Session three with Bernardine
My third session with Bernardine was the first session we looked at actual poems. My first task was to write poems as one of my characters and I chose to follow John's story. At first I only knew that I would write about the dates he went on but then it became more so I have him ones about him at work, dates, and meeting my main character Kathy.
The feedback was good - they needed work as first drafts usually to need to have. The one thing I could do was write more description which I realized I cut back on because I was trying to write in a more condensed way. Of course description can live in one sentence and be specific so I need to go through the poems and put more in.
Bernardine suggested that I add more to his character and the desciption of the world around him (through his eyes) by watching the type of men I thought would most resemble him. I think I can be up to that task ;) I am also going into Selfridge's to find his cologne - what does it smell like, why did he pick it, etc. and also to go through the suit section - feel the make, the cut, how did his suit, clothes, bag, shoes, hair cut, style show more about him. I never thought of actually feeling/ experience those parts of a character.
SO this weekend it's a trip to the shop and some coffee drinking/ people watching. Well cute boy watching actually. Hee hee.
The feedback was good - they needed work as first drafts usually to need to have. The one thing I could do was write more description which I realized I cut back on because I was trying to write in a more condensed way. Of course description can live in one sentence and be specific so I need to go through the poems and put more in.
Bernardine suggested that I add more to his character and the desciption of the world around him (through his eyes) by watching the type of men I thought would most resemble him. I think I can be up to that task ;) I am also going into Selfridge's to find his cologne - what does it smell like, why did he pick it, etc. and also to go through the suit section - feel the make, the cut, how did his suit, clothes, bag, shoes, hair cut, style show more about him. I never thought of actually feeling/ experience those parts of a character.
SO this weekend it's a trip to the shop and some coffee drinking/ people watching. Well cute boy watching actually. Hee hee.
Labels: bernardine everisto, poems, poetry
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